Does being almost mid-40s make you automatically think about the road less traveled? I read a writing prompt on Twitter today to choose a career you’ve always wanted and write about a character who’s actually working in that field. Well, it’s late, and I didn’t sleep last night, and as long as I have the computer on, the LilyBelle won’t go to sleep, and I’ll be in here forever….so, I’m just going to write about my dream jobs…

I’m not sure it’s a secret that teaching wasn’t my first career choice. Well, let me think…in high school, I was accepted to UNC-Greensboro in the Teaching Fellows program. I wanted to work with kids who had behavior-emotional problems (I knew I could fix them, you see!). Life happened, and I didn’t go — Oh, stupidity…why do you affect the young so?? Anyway, working with kids seemed to be the best fit for me, so I ended up studying psychology; flirted with chucking it my junior year and getting a teaching degree, but that would require an additional year of school, and at the time, I wasn’t willing to do that.

So…here are some dream jobs I’ve had since I was little — in sort of chronological order as I recall them:

Steph’s 13 Dream Jobs

1) astronaut — life dream since 3rd grade at least. I used to love looking at the sky and wondering about the clouds and what was above them and what space travel was like…and, you get to pee your pants and no one says ANYTHING!!! But about sixth or seventh grade, I figured out that math was involved, and, well, math and me…we’ve never gotten along.

2) lawyer — this may have been like a middle school ideal. I like to argue, but not listen, so I figured out quickly that I would suck at lawyering. (Umm…this could have been because I was way into a tv show at the time called the “Paper Chase” — wasn’t that about law students at Harvard? But I also wanted to right the wrongs of the world (probably for selfish childhood reasons).

3) CIA agent — I still haven’t given this one up. It was definitely high school when this idea came to me. I was into reading about the government and gathering intelligence and being undercover. I seriously want to be Kinsey Bly on NCIS Las Angeles! She is so freaking tough!

4) travel writer/photographer — because every day would be an adventure. I especially wanted to travel to Italy and Greece and follow Odysseus’s trail — I loved mythology.

5) radio announcer — because I was in love with the son of a local radio station owner, and he’d call to flirt with me and put me on the air and make me do stupid voices and then he’d show up unexpectedly at my high school job to do “remote” broadcasts…I figured if I wasn’t shy on the radio, he’d overlook our seven year age difference. Apparently, he was more worried about how it would look for a 23 y/o dude to be “dating” a 16 y/o girl than I was! haha…

6) cemetery historian — I came up with this one a few years ago in a graduate English class when the professor had this as a creepy outside hobby. I haven’t given it up, but I think she’d get pissed if I stole her idea. But it’s sooooo me!!!

7) archeologist — well, this one sort of combines with an underwater treasure hunter because I’d love to be able follow clues and unlock mysteries of different ancient cultures. Or go diving and find some cool undiscovered pirate ship. This one has been a dream job since I was probably twelvish, but got worse when I lived in Vegas and attended a training on The Jason Project. I learned about the age of the mountains out west and that if the earth plates had moved like a quarter inch, Vegas would have been a rainforest rather than a desert. Cool, huh?

8) Greyhound bus researcher — I just found this one out….I saw an interview with a dude a few months back who had literally ridden the bus cross-country several times, interviewed fellow passengers to find out their stories, wrote them down, published it, and now he’s a gazillionaire. Why can’t I think of something stupid like that??

9) Heiress — I just want to learn that my long lost great-grandmama, who had been searching for me since the tragic death of my real parents, had finally found me. The shock was so great that she keeled over dead with a heart attack, but not before leaving me her gazillions and English title of Duchess!! (I’m not giving this one up either; it could happen!)

10) traveling fair/circus performer — Have you read Water for Elephants??? If so, you’d understand; if not, get thee to a bookstore immediately!

11) independent bookstore owner — I tried to get the Kevman to start a bookstore/coffee shop for me a few years back, but he’s not brave enough. He likes that I have a steady paycheck. “YOU’RE HOLDING ME BACK, SUCKA!”

12) Senate aide — I know government jobs probably aren’t very popular, but I’ve always thought that Washington would be a glamourous place to work. And the way the Representatives and Senators are, there could be “perks” — haha….(geez, I’m glad no one’s going to read this post tonight!! haha)

13) investigative reporter — Can I bring down the bad guy? I think this goes back to my wanting to be a CIA agent…I need a world of good guys and bad guys. Who am I supposed to believe? Who’s lying? And, most importantly, WHY???

I like collecting dream jobs…you never know when you might get the opportunity to do something different, so you have to be ready. But now that I’m finished with my list, I think I might really want to write about a character with one of these jobs….I can wonder what it would be like to live that life rather than the one I have. Wonder if I’d miss this one??

What dream jobs do you have?

p.s….I left off Krispy Kreme employee…but that’s probably for the best!

p.s.s Thought, if you’re still reading, you’d like to hear the poem my post reminds me of…