in graduate school a few years ago, i had the greatest american lit professor EVER. oh, she was the normal old-lady prof who made us read the crappiest crap of american lit (SHE called them “classics”–I called them throw-up-in-my-mouth-ics!). so why was she sooooooo great??? because she had the creepiest hobby ever in the history of the free world: she “studied” gravestones! and this is SUCH a cool “hobby” they have their own “society”!! one of the classes i had with her was called “death in american literature” (the ABSOLUTE BEST class!!), where she was able to submerge us (the class) totally in her gift of the creep. each night, after leaving class, i could feel death stalking me, beckoning me toward the gravestone that the prof would then scrutinize and deconstruct with her subsequent students….and, i have to share this youtube video that she showed us in class one night. she was so giddy, i think she might have squealed with delight! unfortunately, i’m not sure what kind of dude (or dudette) one would have to be to film the graveyards, much less add hip, upbeat music to the pics!! (btw…this is long, so don’t try to watch the whole thing–unless you’re into it; after a couple of minutes, you’ll get the gist of the idea!)

anyway, why am i talking about such a creepy hobby? reminiscing about a previous professor? well, i’ve decided that i totally need my own creepy hobby. why can’t i just walk in her footsteps and study gravestones? one reason is i’m afraid that that sort of historical-marker activity attracts only those with more wrinkles than me (haha)…and two, i don’t want to copy her. three, i want to do something that makes me look cool but doesn’t risk death (sorry, no parachutes or cliff-diving) or one that screams old-lady-smell (good-bye to my knitting needles!). i did a google search and here are a few contenders:

1. i can learn to sew creepy little scary things: or how about this one:

2. i can join the sasquatch society and get on the local tv news (bet no one knew this was a real “club”!!)

3. i can be a ghost hunter, but i’m afraid of letting the devil get a hold of my body (carry over from years of pentecostal church teachings).

4. i can try my hand at handcuff collecting (just google it! haha)

5. i can be a storm/tornado chaser and finally meet my heart-throb-weather-channel-boyfriend, jim cantore! 

actually, none of these are really popping up like a “WOW, that would be so cool!” but i need some sort of distraction from my daily life at school with the teenagers who are so apathetic and disengaged, and administrators who never taught, so their additional paperwork and other minutiae shouldn’t really matter. seriously? with all the other things a teacher has to deal with, NOW i have to come in earlier, work later for no extra pay, but make sure that all my disengaged students become engaged? oh, and all those kids with IEPs have to pass your class, after YEARS of us just passing the buck from one teacher to the next??

sure, no problem. super teacher can do it.

anybody know SC governor marc sanford’s number? i need a map for the appalachian trail. maybe i need to “go hiking”!!! haha….

Advertisements