Maybe it’s just me, but the political and economic climates are not favorable to teaching–it could be because teaching is a girl thing and governing is a boy thing; but that’s just simplistic, right?? maybe. so, because i think i might be depressed (0r at least in a seriously rotten mood), i thought i’d try to think of another profession that, with just a little training, i might able to do…

  • i could wear jeans and tennis shoes to work and not get sent home for violating dress code!!
  • when i get stressed, i can yell “ahhhh, s**t,”  and no one would blink an eye
  • using a wire whip on a problem is socially acceptable
  • when i fix the leaky faucet, the drips follow my direction (lefty-loosey; righty-tighty)  and go away (as opposed to high school “drips” who don’t)
  • no one would ask “when am i going to use this?”
  • i’d get paid by the hour–and have a decently timed lunch break, stretching out the day for extra pay
  • i could retaliate against smart-ass customers by “forgetting” to tighten a bolt or leave out a washer
  • i’d have my very own video game named after me– and everyone would want to spend time with me
  • snakes don’t hide behind the other tools
  • most of my customers would take what i say as truth — they would accept that i knew the best way to fix a problem
  • glue, tape, welding materials (see FIRE!), and club-like instruments are acceptable problem-solutions
  • i could get back at jake and show him MY ass sometimes!! hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha– i just totally cracked myself up!

Th-th-tha–that’s all folks! Coming tomorrow: caring for your high school graduate! maybe this “humor” writing will take off and i can…well, “take off”!!! hahahahahahahahahahaha—there, i did it again!